We all think differently don’t we? Between last night and today morning, there have been thoughts that i have not put on paper. But yesterday too, a lot of thoughts went unrecorded, for i somewhere kept thinking that they would gain the status of unwarranted thoughts, once there is a phone call, or a message or even a mail. But none came. Not even by a suggestion, was the thought conveyed that there was regret.
I read a book sometime back, where the deeds of Hercules, the greek warrior is taken as a backdrop to deal with the demons in our own minds. Each problem is a battle that the Hercules in us tries to fight, and if we want to win like Hercules did, then we need to fight right.
One of the battle is the battle of the egos. Does an apology constitute for the loss of this battle? I really don’t know. But i do know that to win a battle, apology can be a tool. And sometimes winning is not always everything you know.... If you are able to acknowledge and let the other person know that you feel the hurt, that you validate it, then you are verbalising your victory. But most of us find it so difficult to do so! Your own hurt you; and somewhere, i am able to understand that maybe it is only a preparation for greater battles. If i am able to survive this hurt, then strangers hurting me (which is bound to happen) would be something that i would handle as a cakewalk. So i thank all those who come close to me and give me this weapon to fight my battles! I am sure Hercules too did not have such preparations before he went to fight!
Mohana Narayanan
March 4, 2011
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